


Of things not said

by angededesespoir



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Death of random insignificant enemy, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Other, Partings, Reunions, alcohol mention, smoking mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 18:50:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9671504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angededesespoir/pseuds/angededesespoir
Summary: Jesse suddenly disappears and you're left with many questions and regrets.





	1. To Come and Go.....

**Author's Note:**

  * For [likesittinspoons](https://archiveofourown.org/users/likesittinspoons/gifts).



> This is a gift for Spoons for the Emergenji Secret Admirer Event. Happy Valentine's Day!
> 
> I would like to note that this is my first time writing a Reader-Insert thing. Hopefully it sounds okay.
> 
> (Can also be read on [Tumblr](http://angededesespoir.tumblr.com/post/157143698540/of-things-not-said-ch-1).)

The sound of your boots echos down the empty hall.  It’s early.  Earlier than most people get up here (and they tend to rise very early [most not because they want to]).

You’re used to meeting McCree around this time in a secluded spot on base that most people don’t know about.  Usually you share drinks, cigarettes.  Sometimes there’s small talk or venting.  Sometimes deeper subject matter comes up.  Parts of your pasts that you'd both like to forget.  
And sometimes...sometimes one of you works up the guts to kiss the other- softly, over too soon.  (Neither of you will mention it later.)

You’re used to meeting McCree.  Only Jesse’s not at your usual meeting place.  And he isn’t in his room.  And the longer you search, it becomes clear that it appears Jesse is not on base at all.

It isn’t like him to disappear without warning.  Even when he’s called away on surprise missions, he always finds a way to alert you.

You’ve received no notice this time.

Your first instinct is to check in with Commander Reyes, but as luck would have it, he’s in a meeting.

So, you go with plan b.  Which has you here- stalking through an empty hallway, knocking on a thick office door, looking like you’re this close to bulldozing through it. 

“Come in!”  


You can’t open the door fast enough.

“Angela.  Good morning- Have you seen Jesse, by any chance?”  


The look she gives has your heart plummeting.  You feel sick with dread.

She gets up, takes you by the shoulders.  “I think you should sit down, [Y/N].” You allow her to pull you along to the chair where she was once seated.  You collapse into it, like the weight of the world is being dropped into your lap.

“...Angela?”  You try to hide the quiver in your voice.  Your mind is generating a million fears.  You had seen him just last night.  He had wished you sweet dreams, as he usually does.  How much can go wrong in a few hour span of time?  


“[Y/N]...”    You are broken from your thoughts by the hand lightly gripping your arm, the other shoving a folded piece of paper into your own hand.  “I woke up to this by my bedside, with a note attached requesting that I give this to you.  Read it.”

Your throat is suddenly painfully dry.  With trembling hands, you open the letter.  Your eyes fall open the familiar scrawl of letters.

  


_“Dear [Y/N],  
_

_I hope this letter finds you well.  Thought Angie would be the best person to get it to you._

_For as many times as I’ve had to say goodbye, I can’t say it’s gotten any easier over time.  This time is no exception._

_I’m sorry I had to leave ya before our annual Valentine’s date.  Don’t worry- you won’t miss out on your gift.  This one’s even sweeter than the last- I promise._

_I can’t tell you why I’m leaving or where I’m going, but if my suspicions are correct, you’ll start learning things soon, one way or another._

_Stay safe, [Y/N].  Be wary of who you trust.  Get out if you have to._

_One of these days we’ll meet again, somewhere where it’s high noon and they have all the whiskey in the world to drink._

_Yours fondly,_

_Jesse McCree_

_P.S.  I need to get this off my chest, just in case things don’t pan out as planned.  I’ve never told you before, but I’m telling ya now-  I love you, darlin’.  You make this cruel world a little easier to bear.  And each time I take a shot or a drag or take out another enemy, I’ll be thinkin’ about you, wishing you were by my side again._

_‘Til next we meet.  XO.”_  


  


Eventually you feel Angela clutching your arm, hear the repetition of your name.  You cling to it like it’s the last piece of solid earth before you fall from the cliff.

At some point you had fallen from the chair.  You’re down on your knees, letter crumpling in your hand.

“I’m fine. I’m fine.”  


It becomes a mantra that neither of you believe.  How could any of this be fine?  What did any of this mean?  How much does Angela know?  What about Reyes?  And why, why did you never.....

You squeeze your eyes shut, try to block out the stream of never-ending thoughts and sudden regrets.

Gently, Angela holds you.

And you let her, a wet patch slowly forming on the shoulder of her coat.

“I’m here, [Y/N].  I’m here.”  


And that has to be enough.


	2. .....And to Come again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Fun Fact: I almost left it at the first chapter, but then I was like, ‘Nicole, for Pete’s sake, it’s nearly Valentine’s Day! You can’t be that cruel!’ Henceforth, this chapter came into being._
> 
>  
> 
> _(Can also be read on[Tumblr](http://angededesespoir.tumblr.com/post/157143700725/of-things-not-said-ch-2).)_

There’s the familiar click of another cartridge sliding into place as you ready your gun.  Bullet shells litter the dirt around you, shining bright as the sun beats down.

You could think of a thousand things you’d rather be doing than spending Valentine’s in the middle of a desert getting shot at.  

You wipe away the sweat beading at your forehead, and you’re reaching for your canteen to take a swig when suddenly your comm. goes of.  

 _‘Odd,’_ you think, because all day you haven’t been having trouble with the device, but now you’re straining to hear over the crackling static that hisses through the message.

You bite your cracked lip and look around, nervously alert.  Whatever was being said, you figure it can’t be anything good.

You wait for several minutes, anticipating an attack, finger near the trigger, ready.

Or at least you think you’re ready.  

Nothing quite prepared you for what happens next.

Loud and clear you hear a phrase you haven’t heard in ages.  You turn in time to see the bullet make contact with a skull, before the enemy is sprawled out on the dirt, blood splattering.  (How, in your alertness, they had managed to sneak so close, is a mystery to you.)

Standing off aways in front of you is a sight you have long since given up hope on seeing again.  A stray tumbleweed dares to roll by the man standing tall, clad in cowboy attire.  It’s different than you remember, but the stance, the pistol, the way he’s looking at you as he paces forward- it _has_ to be him.  

Every fibre of your being is telling you to move, but you no longer trust your legs.  You wait.

And he comes.

He stops a few feet away, tips his hat.  “[Nickname].”  

It’s just a whisper, but you can feel your heart skip a beat.  It **has** to be him.  No one else used that name with you, and he had only ever done it in private.

“J-Jesse?”  


You catch the slight nod.  “Been awhile, hasn’t it, darlin’?”

For a moment, you’re not sure what to do or say, the mess of your emotions causing your brain to spew out different commands.  Should you cry?  Ask questions?  Slap him?  .....Kiss him?

Shakingly you push yourself up onto cramped legs, wincing, then, somehow, without the grace you would have wanted for this moment, you close the gap, throwing your arms around him.

You feel the heaviness of his embrace, the heat of metal through the serape that’s thrown over his form.  You press closer, listen to a blur of repeated phrases drawled out in a comforting tone.

“Jesse.....where have you been?”   _‘What took you so long?’_

There’s so many questions you have, but it’s all you can manage at the moment as you swallow around the lump in your throat.

A hand rubs soothingly at your back.  “Places.  Nowhere worth speaking about now, sweetheart.”

It’s not the answer you want, but you accept it.  Hopefully you can get more of an answer later.  

You look up at him, swallow.  “Did you get the messages?  About the Recall?  Is that why you’re here?”  


“Indeed.  Been getting them.  Was just waiting ‘til y’all got close enough.”  His lips curve up.  “Thought now would be the perfect time.  Heard my favourite person was going to make an appearance.”  


It’s enough to earn a smile from you. “Oh, really now?  And who might that be?”

He leans forward, presses a soft kiss to your forehead.  “Well, I reckon you know the answer to that, sugar.”

He reaches up, strokes your cheek.  “I know you must have many questions.  I’ll try my darnedest to answer them all later.”  There’s another peck to your forehead, and then he’s pulling you closer.  “I missed you, darlin’.”

“I missed you, too, Jesse.”  


You stand, pressed against him, for what somehow seems like both hours and mere seconds.  Then you hear a whisper in your ear.

“So, you enjoy those chocolates?”  


It takes you a second to register what he’s talking about, and then you laugh.  “Yes.  But I could go for something sweeter, right now.”

“That I can do, sweetpea.  That I can do.”  


You feel him start to pull away.

“But first, I suppose we should deal with these bad guys.”  


You nod.  “I think you’re right, gunslinger.” 

It’s been so long, but things are already falling back into routine. With him by your side, it’s like all those years of waiting and distance never happened.

He’s back. He’s home. You get your second chance.

And that’s enough.


End file.
